Looking a little brighter

I stayed home from work today to take Marley to the doctor.

After another very long night of coughing, wheezing and crying Marley finally fell asleep at 3:30am. She slept until 8am. I gave her tylenol round the clock as well as sips as water and she seems a little better today.

She woke up her eyes all red and puffy, snot and drool everywhere. Diarrhea. She drank some milk but is overall very lethargic today (probably because she is not eating any food). She also has one of the meanest diaper rash/yeast infection I have even seen.

At the doctor's office the official weigh in showed that she hasn't gained any weight in 2 months but she hasn't lost any weight either. Fortunately, Marley's pediatrician is not dwelling on her lack of weight gain like I do but she does want us to see a developmental nutritionist as soon as possible. She ordered a swallow study and gave us a prescription for her high-calorie soy drink so that insurance will cover it. She also prescribed antibiotic nasal drops to alleviate the nasal congestion.

I sat with Marley today and let her nibble on sour patch kids and her nuk brush, let her play with yogurt melts and puffs and added lactobacillus to her soy drink to drink to lessen her diarrhea. I hoping to get the diarrhea in control very soon though the pediatrician said it can take up to 2 weeks to resolve.

Perhaps I am feeling better too. I don't know. I'm am exhausted from lack of sleep and my normally low level of stress has been ramped up a bit in the last few days but I am coping and I know that this too will pass.

Hunger Strike

I can't believe it has come to this, but Marley has stopped eating food.

And I am miserable.

At first Marley just started rejecting purees. But over this weekend not only will she not eat purees but she won't swallow any food. Any food that reaches the back of her mouth causes her to gag and choke violently. She will not eat, I assume, because she is afraid of choking.

My only saving grace is that she is still drinking milk from her sippy cup. But it is not nearly enough to make up for the lost calories she was getting from food.

So she isn't gaining weight and I find out tomorrow if she is actually losing weight. And losing weight would be a disaster.

On top of all that she was just starting to get better from 5 weeks of a viral congestion and ear infection. Now she is sick all over again accompanied by diarrhea and chest congestion.

Last night she barely slept and either did I.

I spoke with her feeding therapist and pediatrician today and I am hoping to find some answers and more importantly some solutions. I expect Marley will be having a swallow study by the end of the week to rule out any physical conditions for her gagging and choking. But I am not feeling very optimistic that she is going to get better anytime soon.

I am trying so hard to get through this without stressing out too much but I am feeling very quickly that I am reaching my limit.

Deep breath...